Van Culture

You want to know what’s worse than a blog that hasn’t been updated for nearly a week? I’ll tell you what’s worse: The woeful demise of American van culture.

Sure, light rail, street cars and bicycles are all great and “green,” but there’s just no artistic flair in those sensible approaches. How do you airbrush a mermaid on the side of a bicycle? What’s the one thing that can save General Motors? The solar-powered super-van, that's what.

I know what you’re thinking: “Yes, of course more hip gibberish, more van-jive, more youth identification … all of that crap that you p.r. people come up with.”

I’m telling you, we came so close to discovering breakthroughs in van technology in the late 70’s. I blame Jimmy Carter, but others say it was the greed of Wall Street tycoons that killed research into van designs that rocked hard while achieving respectable gas mileage.

In case you have doubts, be sure to rent the groundbreaking documentary, “Dude, Who Killed the Super Van?” Here's the trailer:



By the way, that's poet Charles Bukowski appearing at about the 1:08 mark.